
As any new mom can attest, motherhood does not simply come with a new bundle. You also receive a lifetime of advice free of charge. :) At the slightest wimper of your precious child you will receive countless suggestions and endless recommendations on how when and where you should care for your baby. Don't get me wrong, this can be very helpful. Were it not for the wisdom of the ages I would have never learned to have an extra wipe handy when changing boys and many other highly valuable tricks of the trade. I have however realized there were a few things nobody has ever shared. I've taken the liberty of compiling a short list just in case there are any newbies out there in need of a hand. :)
Nobody told me....
Macaroni and Cheese leaves grease rings on clothing
Nobody told me....
You have the right to dance around the house exclaiming to anyone who will listen (most likely the dog) how amazing and talented you are when you remove the grease ring from the "Old Navy" hand me down.
Nobody told me...
You will get desperate enough to sit on the potty seat.
Nobody told me...
During your brief reign on the potty throne you will hear a loud crash followed by shrieks of pain.
Nobody told me...
When your child does not like something he has eaten, he must remove it from his mouth and place it in your hand. Nothing else will adequately display his level of disgust!
Nobody tole me...
It is possible to clean all appropriate parts during a 2 minute shower.
Nobody told me...
Should you abuse your 2 minute shower privilege 2 year olds can take matters into their own hands...FLUSH!!!
Nobody told me...
The clock moves twice as fast during naptime.
Nobody told me...
A mommy is better than MacIver. We can fix anything with fresh batteries and baby wipes. (We don't even need the chewing gum)
Nobody told me...
Fresh batteries make toys twice as obnoxious.
Nobody told me...
How much prettier the world is through 2 year old eyes.